Kadiera's Playground Cute but Evil - it averages out

It's hard to turn loose of a project you've thought of as your own personal baby, and let other people run with it while you step back, even if you need the break.

It's infinitely harder to watch those you've entrusted your accomplishments and progress to run the project into the ground in a fraction of the time it took you to build it up.

from http://www.breastfeeding123.com/reaping-the-rewards-of-breastfeeding/

“Breastfeeding has been shown to reduce stress and protect maternal mood. Breastfeeding also reduces stress of babies of depressed mothers and protects them from the harmful effects of maternal depression.”

and

“there is good evidence that women who breastfed their infants had up to a 12 percent reduced risk of type 2 diabetes for each year they breastfed.”

It probably comes across as a bit odd, but I love the *place* that I work - the actual spot, completely separate from what I do or who I work for.

This morning, there were dark clouds in the west, the sun was rising in the east, and the leaves here are just starting to turn to fall colors. It was a fabulous sight, and made me wish I had my camera, though I suspect it'd be hard to capture the whole thing on film in a way that transmits the same sense of awe.

You know what?

It's been a stressful year.

There are some things in life that are not worth stressing over. The dishes come to mind immediately - I'm pretty good about not stressing about getting the dishes done.

There are other things that I'm not so good about not stressing about, and I'm going to need to work on that.

This week's thing to not stress about: breastmilk.

Alex is not going to starve - there's formula when there's not enough milk. It is not the end of the world if him getting more formula means I get more sleep and am less preoccupied with trying to fit in more and more pumping to try to keep up.

It's true....I'm a chocolate fiend.

The bacon chocolate was tasty, if a bit over-done.

The curry chocolate is....maybe a bit too spicy for my tastes, but still yummy.

The ancho chocolate was bitter - but then, it was like 70% cacao.

The sea salt and almonds chocolate bar is to die for.

The ground hazelnut chocolate is too soft. tasty, but lacking in body.

Barry was hit by a car this morning and had surgery to fix his broken leg. H's not allowed to put weight on it for 8 weeks.

Like we needed more to deal with

This post is rather self-centered; if that's a problem skip on to something else :-)

*****

I am feeling somewhat better. Not perfect, and there really aren't *good* days yet, but there are a hell of a lot fewer bad days.

Therapy is...odd. I think she's still trying to grasp the insanity that is my life, and all the things that play into why I am the way I am, and how screwed up things could be in my head, and the fact that they're not nearly that bad. Things we've agreed on so far include that my dad is who he is, and while he's hurtful, it's not really on purpose, because he's more broken than I am. And that friends are important.

LOLMuppets:

more lol celebs!

random inks I found while looking up info on Alex's lungs....

Ambiguous loss and premature birth - why parents struggle with premature birth, and why friends and relatives have a hard time knowing how to handle it.

things to say/do (or not say or do) for the friends of parents of preemies

Crest ProHealth mouthwash can stain teeth?